By page 27 of Fifty Shades of Grey the reader is still on the hardware scene. Yay me for cutting out those pages of beautiful narrative like:

“Our fingers brush very briefly, and the current is there again, zapping through me like I’ve touched an exposed wire. I gasp involuntarily as I feel it all the way down to somewhere dark and unexplored, deep in my belly.”

Dark and unexplored. Like your colon.